People will teach you a lot, if you let them. One such life lesson, dealing with difficult people, came my way decades ago in that building behind me; our family restaurant at the time, Grandma’s Kitchen in Whitefield, New Hampshire. It’s a lesson worth sharing because advertising will bring the occasional knucklehead through your door too.
First, let’s wind the clock back to the bicentennial year of 1976. I was 17. Had a car. Had money. Had time. Had some sketchy ideas too. Get the picture? Mom did too. That’s why she decided to “hire” me. Instead of summer fun with friends, I worked at Grandma’s. Overnights: 11pm-to-7am. Six nights a week. All. Summer. Long.
Good things seldom start after midnight
Most nights were deadly quiet—until 2:30 a.m. That’s when the bars closed. Headlights flooded the parking lot. Customers poured in, filling the room with 90 minutes of bedlam: Partially, fully, and excessively lit party people all wanted food and fun on the way home. Food they found on the menu. Fun they found in messing with me.
Years later, I still apply the lessons learned in those many nocturnal skirmishes. Chief among them: never argue with a drunk.
Okay, drunk isn’t a nice word. But, how else do you describe inebriated people trying taking advantage of you while irrationally believing they should get away with it? I’m sticking with drunk. It works better in mixed company than other less appropriate terms.
Five ways to deal with a drunk
I’m betting you deal with the occasional drunk, too. We all do. Whenever I encounter one, my experience in the trenches of Grandma Kitchen sure comes in handy.
1. Don’t take it personally
People are who they are. It’s not because of you
2. Don’t bother reasoning
Rationality in the absence reason is rhetorical quicksand
3. Focus on the outcome
Don’t get sucked into the moment; stay on course
4. Make them the winner
Put what they want on the other side of what you need
5. Remember why you’re there
Rude dollars deposit in the bank just like polite ones
Returning to the scene
During the summer of 2011, my kids and I went on a thousand-mile New England road trip that took us past Grandma’s Kitchen. Even though Mom sold it long ago and moved west, I still had to take my kids in for dinner. While it’s changed a great deal, it’s still the same to me. It’s where I learned how to deal with a drunk and still get my job done. Thanks, Mom.
Turns out it didn’t hurt you at all learned lessons early that takes some people a lifetime
I could never have done it without you………..thank you
Love you
Sounds like a good idea. Don’t argue with a drunk. It will get you nowhere. Let them think they are winning in the situation. Very wise words. Thank you!